Shaudrey one shots
by yellowlitchi
Summary: A few Shaudrey one shots and drabbles. tw: mental illness (pt 3)
1. She's hiding behind the sofa

Shelby's phone rang, loud enough to wake her up. Gosh, she had to change that damn ringtone. She took a peek at the screen and fell back onto the bed in a heavy sigh. She grunted as she forced herself to get up. What had happened now?

She pulled up in the studio's car park and put on her sunglasses before making her way to the main entrance. She glanced at her reflection in a window and stopped for a second. The blood orange sun underlined her puffy eyes, she pushed the glasses up the bridge of her nose to try and hide them. She entered busy hall and checked her watch. 5:36am. Despite how early it was, the place was already crowded and noisy, which was quite overwhelming for Shelby. Assistants running around trying to find a specific type of coffee, trolleys carrying boom mics being pushed, a middle-aged man yelling at people to be silent and employees trying to make as little noise as possible.

In the crowd, Shelby spotted a familiar face and walked up to an enthusiastic looking man carrying a folder. He was wearing big round glasses and a pair of bright yellow dungarees, like a ray of sunshine in the middle of all this chaos. He flashed a smile and immediately pulled her into a hug.

"So, where is she?" Shelby took a step back.

The man's smile suddenly turned into an expression of concern. Shelby followed him outside, behind the studio area, to where one of the makeup trailer was parked. He opened the door and let her get up inside. Shelby entered the van and looked around. Her heart skipped a beat at the sound of loud sobs. He pointed at the corner and muttered, Shelby could sense the worry in his croaky voice.

"She's hiding behind the sofa."

The man rubbed his hand against his forhead, frustrated. Shelby turned to him and nodded, indicating that she could handle the situation. He sighed in relief and vanished back into a nearby building. The crying was clearly coming from the sitting area. Shelby made her way to the velvet couch, only to find Audrey sitting on the floor, hudled in on herself and holding her head inbetween her knees. She crouched down and softly caressed Audrey's arm. Before she could say anything, the woman looked up at her, eyes full of tears. Audrey sniffled and wiped her runny nose with her sleeve. Shelby delicately dried her tears and placed a soft kiss on her forehead as she did so. She shifted and sat down next to Audrey, who immediately rested her head on Shelby's shoulder, platine strays tangling with silky blonde locks.

"Look at me. I'm pathetic." Audrey sobbed, with a lump in her throat.

Shelby tilted her chin up in a soft gesture and gave her a shy smile.

"You are everything but pathetic, baby. Now tell me, what happened?" Shelby asked in a very gentle tone. Audrey started fidling with her pendant and sighed under her breath.

"It's just that… well I keep forgetting my lines, so we have to do the takes over and over again, then the director gets mad, and then I get upset, and it just ends up like this. What is wrong with me? It's not even that bloody hard! All I have to do is memorize a sheet of paper, and I mess it up everytime! Next time that happens, they're going to fire me for sure."

Shelby listened at everything Audrey had to say and didn't interrupt, mindlessly playing with the woman's hair.

"And so then he starts yelling at me and I don't know what to say, and everyone else is watching, like literally just watching us!". Audrey paused and took a deep breath.

"God, they must all hate my guts, I should just leave this production and find another job or something. I'm useless here, they could find someone ten times better than me by making one single phone call."

Shelby's heart was breaking more and more at each of the woman's words. She looked her in the eye as tears rolled down Audrey's cheeks.

"Hey. It's gonna be alright, you can do this. And that's not true. You're not who people think you are."

"No. I'm worse."

Shelby wrapped her into her arms and hugged her tightly. She wiped the tears off her cheeks and started rocking her softly. Audrey tried to calm her hitching breath and buried her face in the woman's chest. Once her vision wasn't so blury anymore and the sobbing had stopped, Audrey pulled back slightly and looked up at a smiling Shelby. She scrunched her nose.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"Treating me like a person."

As Audrey's gaze fell to her feet, Shelby felt the tears coming to her. But she had to stay strong, for Audrey. She placed her hand on her chin and tilted her chin up, smiling softly.

"You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be loved. And I'm here for that."

She cupped her cheek and kissed her softly, her lips brushing againt Audrey's hungrily. The woman responded immediately and kissed back, tugging onto blonde locks as she completely gave into the kiss. What had started as a chaste peck on the lips was now turning into a heated embrace. Shelby slowly pulled back, earning a small whine from Audrey. She smiled teasingly.

"I love you, Audrey Tindall."

"I love you more, Shelby Miller."


	2. Bulletproof

It was a warm afternoon and the sun was shining on the city of Philadelphia. Shelby was sunbathing on the patio of the house she had just moved into with Audrey.

"Honey, what would you like for dinner tonight?" She heard her wife call from the kitchen.

Shelby closed her magazine and got up from the deck chair, making her way back inside the house. Audrey was sitting on the counter in the kitchen, a cookery book in her hands.

"I really wanna make biscuits." Audrey looked up at her and pouted.

"But baby you can't have cookies for diner!"

"Why not?" The look Audrey gave her Shelby knew she couldn't resist. She sighed and took some utensils out of the cupboard.

"What do you wanna make?" She asked.

Audrey put her fist up in the air as a sign of victory and got up from the counter. She made her way over to Shelby.

"No no no. I'm doing the baking. You just go and relax in the sitting room, I'll bring them to you when I'm done here."

"You sure, honey?" Shelby squinted her eyes but smiled softly.

"Darling yes! I can manage this all by myself!" Audrey assured her, chucking softly. Shelby sighed, backing off.

"Okay, okay, I'll leave you to it then."

Audrey jumped around in excitement, she quickly gathered all the ingredients while Shelby sat herself on the couch in the other room. She opened the book and followed the recipe carefully. Okay, so I combine the flour and the sugar, then I rub in the butter with my fingers. I mix in the chocolate chips. The preparation was looking more and more like cookie dough, to Audrey's satisfaction. She had just started rolling the dough into small balls when Shelby crawled up behind her, wrapping her arms around her stomach.

"Hey. How is it going here?" Shelby placed a kiss on Audrey's cheek.

"Fine, for now." Audrey chuckled softly.

"Hey, you did make sure to use the gluten free flour, didn't you?" She asked as she watched Audrey pop the balls of dough onto a baking tray.

"Whoops. Hum, I might have…"

"Audrey!"

"I'm sorry! I don't know what I was thinking!" Audrey's cheeks turned red, she couldn't believe she hadn't thought about her wife's allergies.

"Oh god, I'm so sorry. I'll make another batch right now." She set the dough aside and got the gluten free flour out of the cupboard, about to start all over again. As she started stirring the sugar in, she looked up at Shelby, who was gave her an innocent smile.

"What?"

"Nothing…" Shelby teased.

That's when Audrey noticed Shelby was rolling the dough into more balls and was ready to aim them at her.

"You weren't gonna do anything with them anyway… so…"

Audrey stopped stirring and covered her face with her arms.

"I'm bulletproof…but please, don't shoot me."

Too late. She was already getting attacked by a couple of dough balls. She couldn't help bu laugh before she picked up a piece of dough.

"Cookie dough fight!" She screamed, shooting back at Shelby who immediately responded. One of the balls hit Audrey on the forehead, causing her to stop throwing.

"Here, that'll teach you!" Shelby chuckled, earning a scowl from Audrey. She ran up to her and wrapped her arms around her, which didn't fail to make her laugh. As she kissed her softly, she could feel Audrey smiling against her lips. A few moments later, she pulled back, still holding her in her arms. She looked her straight in the eyes.

"Hey, now let's finish this."

Audrey nodded and placed a small peck on her nose.

"Let's do this together."


	3. We're in this together

"Let me just grab my bag."

Audrey turned around to fetch it, but Shelby was quicker than her and raced to the living room.

"Got it!"

She raised her fist in victory, holding the purse up in the air so that Audrey couldn't reach it.

"Hey! That's not fair."

Audrey fussed, leaping up to try and catch it and earning a laugh from Shelby, who was now running around the room and waving the bag all over the place. She seemed so enthusiastic about it, Audrey couldn't help but to chase her around the sofa. Shelby turned around to see if she was catching up, and let the handbag escape her hands. As she was still running, it landed quite violently and all of Audrey's belonging flew across the floor.

"Whoops!"

She rushed to pick it all up and carefully place everything back in the purse.

"Don't worry, it's fine." Audrey crouched down to help her. She smiled at a now a little embarrassed Shelby, who smiled shyly in reply.

Shelby picked up a small cardboard packaging and held it up to Audrey.

"What's this?" She asked, trying to decipher what was written on it.

"Oh, that's just vitamins." Audrey replied mindlessly, not really taking a look at the box.

"Audrey, these aren't vitamins." Shelby stated, her concerned tone catching the woman's attention.

Audrey starred at the box for a few seconds, before grabbing it and stuffing it into her bag. She stood up, but Shelby caught her arm before she could walk away.

"Audrey, how long has this been going on?"

The blonde brushed her bangs to the side and looked down, trying to avoid Shelby's stare. Her lower lip started to quiver and her eyes filled with tears.

"Audrey."

Shelby wrapped her arms around her and rested Audrey's head on her shoulder. Stroking her hair softly, she tried to calm her and whispered.

"Audrey, it's okay. It's nothing to be ashamed of."

The actress looked up at her, a tear rolling down her cheek. Shelby wiped it off and locked eyes with her. She could see the guilt in Audrey's eyes, and wished the woman didn't feel that way.

Audrey took a step back and picked up the box of antidepressants. A simple look at it and she burst into tears.

"I don't know why I'm crying. I never cry. What's happening to me?" She sobbed, burying her head in Shelby's neck.

Shelby placed a strand of hair behind Audrey's ear, which had now grown almost down to her shoulders.

"You're allowed to cry, you're allowed to have feelings. That's a normal human reaction."

She felt Audrey sigh slightly against her cheek, and took her face in her hands so that she could look her in the eye.

"You're an amazing human, Audrey. You're so brave, and talented, I truly admire you. Now you don't have to be perfect all the time, you're allowed to have certain feelings. And these feelings will always be valid, okay?"

Shelby did her best to comfort her, she knew how much Audrey needed someone to support her and tell her everything would be alright. That was her way to tell her she loved her. Audrey nodded at Shelby's words, trying to let the words sink in as she dried her tears.

"I'm here to help you, whatever you need and whenever you need me. We can talk about it if you want, but we don't have to, it's your choice. I don't want you to feel obligated to tell me, I want you to be free."

It was as if the weight that had been pounding over Audrey's shoulders for so long was getting lighter and lighter as Shelby spoke. She had been hiding her illness for so long, and now the woman she loved was acknowledging it and accepting her for who she was.

"I thought getting my dream job and dream life would cure me."

Shelby tried to hide the sadness in her eyes, she wanted Audrey to feel like she could rely on her strength.

"You know, you can have the most perfect job, the most incredible relationships with everyone in your life and have everything you've ever wanted, but at the end of the day still not feel that way deep in your soul."

The words pierced right through Audrey's heart. For the first time, she had found someone who didn't make her feel like she wasn't enough. She felt free with Shelby, she could talk to her about anything without the fear of being judged.

Sometimes, you don't have to say "I love you" to tell someone you love them.

"Thank you." She mumbled, wiping the tears off Shelby's cheeks as the blonde did the same for her. They both laughed softly and Shelby pulled her into a hug.

After a few moments, Audrey wiggled her way out of Shelby's embrace.

"Do you still want to go?"

Audrey looked up and nodded, giving her a hint of a smile. Shelby picked up both of their bags and grabbed their coats, leading Audrey out of the house. They walked down the alley that lead to the car, the same alley they had once walked down together when Shelby had taken Audrey on their first date, Audrey recalled.

She had been battling against depression for years, still she only just realised how far she had come despite her illness.

"I'll drive."

Shelby opened the passenger door for her, gestured the seat and curtsied to Audrey as people did to the Royal Family. She was her Queen of England after all.

"Your Majesty."

Audrey giggled sheepishly and sat down, while Shelby made her way around the car and onto the driver's seat. She turned the key and made the engine roar, she liked to pretend she was driving a sports car. Romanticise your own life, that's what she always said.

She pulled out of the drive and Audrey watched the house get smaller and smaller as they drove away.

They looked at each other and exchanged a smile, Shelby placing a soft kiss on Audrey's lips before her eyes went back to the road. Audrey rested her head against her window melancholically. Like in the movies, she thought. It didn't matter where they were going. As long as they were together and there for each other, everything would be alright.


	4. Better not to know

"Don't forget your lunch!"

Shelby ran after her daughter who was leaving for school. She handed the lunchbox to the teenager who simply rolled her eyes and walked away, not bothering to turn around as her mother waved her goodbye.

The blonde sighed and checked her surroundings before shutting the door. She would then shower, get ready for work, grab something on her way out as "breakfast". Just another typical day. At the end of the day, she'd come home exhausted, and fall asleep on the couch probably. Audrey would be in the kitchen cooking dinner and looking over Skye's shoulder as the girl did her homework. She smiled at the thought.

A quick look at the planner on the kitchen fridge, and Shelby realized that she actually didn't have any yoga classes to teach until late afternoon. That meant she had plenty of time to relax, and maybe even to do a little cleaning. Audrey wasn't up yet, so she decided to have some real breakfast for once. She reached for the granola on the shelf and poured some almond milk into a bowl. She was sitting on the counter enjoying her cereal when a sleepy Audrey made her way into the kitchen.

"Morning honey!" Audrey yawned and placed a small kiss on her wife's nose.

"Morning" Shelby replied with her mouth full.

Audrey turned on the kettle, and hopped onto the counter to sit next to Shelby. Shelby rested her head on her shoulder, Audrey smiled softly. She cherished these moments, and knew that Audrey did too. They could just stay like this forever.

"Well, I gotta get to work!"

Audrey stood and was about to head to her office to go and work on her script, but Shelby was quicker than her and stole her a kiss. They both smiled and Shelby let go of her.

There was a lot of cleaning to do, and Shelby'd better start now if she wanted to be done by the time she had to go to work. _Okay, let's start with the bathroom_.

About three quarters of an hour later, she stepped out of the bathroom and plugged out the vacuum cleaner, plugging it into the socket across the corridor. _Now Skye's room_.

"Ugh, I hate this." She blurted out loud.

She never felt at ease entering her daughter's bedroom without her being there, it seemed to her that she was violating an unwritten but universal rule. Her gaze went across the room and she sighed at the amount of books scattered all over the floor. She started picking them up and pilling them on the desk.

One book in particular caught her attention. It read "do not open". Obviously, it really peaked her curiosity. Shelby being Shelby, all she wanted was to open the book and discover what lay inside. As she caught herself considering that option, she whispered to herself.

"She's my daughter, I can read her diary."

She knew that her daughter had nothing to hide, still she remained fascinated by the book. The urge to unleash what was held inside was stronger than the trust her daughter had placed in her. So without any more hesitation, she slowly turned the cover of the diary, as if she was about to open Pandora's box. She felt the paper between her fingers, the pages were whispering to her and revealing all the unsaid tales.

She hadn't even started to read, she was still somehow fascinated by the journal, it had put such a spell on her that she didn't hear the footsteps coming closer and closer. _September 5_ _th_. She started reading.

Suddenly, the door flew open and Audrey burst into the room.

"Have you seen my iPad? All my notes are on it." Audrey panted, out of breath, one hand on her hip and the other leaning on the door structure.

Still enchanted by the book, it took a few seconds for Shelby to come back to her senses. As she didn't reply immediately, Audrey squinted.

"Everything alright?"

Shelby gathered the books still laying on the floor to try and hide the diary among the other ones. But this time Audrey was quicker, and grabbed the oh so precious book out of her hands.

" _Do not open_? Shelby, what are you doing?"

Shelby looked down. _How shameful of me_ , she thought. _Reading her daughter's journal, invading her privacy, what was she thinking?_

"Shelby why would you read this?" Audrey help up the diary.

Shelby didn't look up, she couldn't confront her wife's stern gaze.

"Bloody hell Shelby! You can't just barge in and go around messing with people's stuff, she's our daughter for God's sake!"

Audrey didn't usually show any moderation in her tone, which came across as quite harsh on some occasions. She tended to bottle her emotions and unleash them in times like this. Shelby knew that what she'd done was immoral and that she deserved all of Audrey's anger. How would she ever regain her trust?

Realizing the bluntness of her words could have hit Shelby, she crouched down next to her and wrapped her arms around her.

"I know that you didn't mean any harm, you were just curious." She said in a softer tone.

"But we're a family. Some things we share, some things we don't have to. If Skye has a diary and writes that on the front, then we must respect that."

Shelby nodded at Audrey's words and hugged her.

"Crikey, I'm getting good at this!" Audrey giggled, and so did Shelby.

"Are you gonna tell her?" Shelby became slightly more worried.

"Oh God no! Of course I won't, her loosing our trust is the last think I'd wish for, and I know that you would've done the same for me, so. Let's put this behind us, we don't need to whine about it for ever."

Shelby uttered a small thanks, and went back to her tidying up. Audrey squeezed her arm to catch her attention.

"Hey. Let me help you with that."

She smiled and stood up to put the diary back on the desk, as Shelby pilled up some more books next to her. Audrey turned around and pulled her into a hug, caressing her cheek with her slender fingers that Shelby covered with kisses.

"Thank you, baby" She whispered in her ear.

Shelby scrunched her nose and Audrey couldn't resist the temptation of placing a small kiss on it, causing them both to giggle. They knew they could rely on each other and that they shared the same feelings regarding each other and their daughter, and that was what made them a family.


End file.
